Along with the rise of covid positive cases, we can see a rise in toxic positivity too. Toxic positivity is the belief that no matter how dire or difficult a situation is, people should maintain a positive mindset. It’s a “positive vibes only” approach to life. Scientific research showed that when you are asked not to think about something,it actually makes you more likely to think about it. In the present moment we are in a crisis.Everyone is facing different forms of challenging situations. During such situations we usually get advice like “Stay positive”. This is toxic positivity. Instead we can say “It’s okay to feel bad sometimes”. Signs of toxic positivity include pretending to be happy when you are feeling bad and trying to force positive feelings and smile. It also includes denial of negative emotions like sadness,anger,frustration and being forced to be optimistic which doesn’t match with the actual situation.Studies depict that people who bottle up their negative emotions actually end up being more aggressive because keeping the negative energy inside resulted in emotional outbursts later on.Humans feel a wide range of positive and negative emotions which plays an important part of well being. For example we express anger to fight against problems and fear to protect us from danger. Like that we express joy when we get something valuable which reminds us what is important in life. On the other hand sadness may signal the intensity of loss which helps to connect us with those we love. Hence all feelings are valid for a human being and must be understood mindfully. There is no doubt that during these uncertain times ,everyone wants to stay positive for their mental well being. Though positive thinking offers some benefits, no one can think positively all the time. People are facing multiple challenges like losing their family members, financial struggles,illness,lockdowns,job loss etc. In this scenario the anxiety ,low mood and advice of others forced us to adopt toxic positivity which later caused more harm to our physical and mental health.
How to deal with toxic positivity
- Recognising and accepting all the negative emotions you have and letting them pass on their own. It can lead to powerful learning through life’s ups and downs.This may even help the brain better process feelings.
- Talk to a close friend about your feelings or write down.
- Minimize the use of social media. Because this is the main platform where toxic positivity has flourished. People are posting pictures with the best looks and moments. There we can see “ positive vibes only”.Very rarely do people post their flaws. Seeing this we also feel pressured to be “positive” and sometimes feel bad if we don’t have that.
- Expand on things you are already good at and familiar with rather than engaging in brand new tasks.
- Adopt Tragic optimism. Tragic optimism is a term coined by an Austrian psychologist and Holocaust survivor Dr. Viktor Frankl in 1985. Frankl defines tragic optimism as the decision to say “yes” to life despite the pain, guilt, and death that one must necessarily face. That means, acknowledging the existence of loss, pain and suffering there is hope and meaning in life .Recent studies showed that people who had accepted that life comes with difficulties and were prepared for them – coped with the impact of covid 19 & lockdowns more effectively than those who did not.
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