In a quiet home in Pune, 57-year-old Sadhana Savagave decided she wouldn’t spend the rest of her life alone. The grief of losing her husband to cancer within four months had left her emotionally adrift. But it also awakened a resolve — a belief that companionship in later life wasn’t just desirable, but necessary.
“Loneliness can hit anyone at any time. It’s far more common than we acknowledge,” says Sadhana, a former businesswoman. “I wanted someone I could talk to, share my day with, travel with — someone who was simply there.”
Sadhana is not alone in this yearning. As life expectancy in India rises — from 59.6 years in 1990 to 70.8 years in 2019, according to a Lancet study — the number of elderly is also growing. A 2022 UN Population Fund study reported that 149 million Indians are aged 60 and above, nearly 10.5% of the population. By 2050, seniors may outnumber children in the country.
But with longer lives comes the shadow of loneliness. Research links isolation in the elderly with depression, dementia, high blood pressure, and cognitive decline. A 2022 PAN Healthcare survey across 10 Indian cities found over 65% of seniors experienced loneliness.
In Chennai, 70-year-old Manimekalai (name changed), a lifelong homemaker, still struggles after losing her husband to a heart attack. Living with an elderly mother-in-law, she says, “I come from a conservative family. For years I didn’t even realise that what I was feeling was loneliness.”
Madhav Damle, a 68-year-old Pune resident, saw this reality firsthand while running a senior home. As children moved abroad or got busy with careers, aging parents were left behind, often widowed and ailing.
“Many seniors lose their spouse before or around 60 — and they still have decades ahead. To live that without a companion is harsh,” he says.
This realization led Damle to found Happy Seniors, a matchmaking service for the elderly, in 2012. Since then, the platform has brought together 75 couples — including Sadhana and her second husband, Nitin Ganpatrao Savagave.
Nitin, an engineering college principal with a son from a previous marriage, met Sadhana in 2020 at Damle’s office. They married that March, just days before India’s first COVID-19 lockdown.
“Seniors are very clear about what they want,” says Damle. “Men often seek younger, conventionally attractive women who can cook; women often look for financially stable men who’ll travel with them and offer emotional support.”
But past relationships cast long shadows. “We counsel them to approach companionship with an open heart. Often, we suggest living together before deciding on marriage — to see if they, and their families, are comfortable,” he adds.
Some adult children, especially those abroad, even reach out to help their parents find partners — understanding the toll loneliness can take.
Before couples begin dating or cohabiting, Damle recommends a written agreement covering finances, daily responsibilities, and the nature of the relationship. “It helps prevent misunderstandings later in life.”
Love in Later Life: Social and Legal Hurdles
While India’s Supreme Court has ruled that live-in relationships are legal and even included them under domestic violence laws, societal acceptance is still a battle.
Inheritance concerns and family resistance are common, especially when children fear disputes or changes in asset distribution. Under the Indian Succession Act of 1925, a widower inherits one-third of his wife’s property. In interfaith marriages, religious personal laws apply.
To avoid such complications, many seniors now opt for live-in relationships or dating without the pressure of marriage. This offers discretion and independence
Even dating apps are witnessing the trend. Indian platform Quack Quack has reported a rise in senior users. A recent survey of 6,000 users aged 50 to 68 revealed that 38% of those from Tier I cities believed society preferred they join yoga classes or golf clubs rather than explore dating.
Among Tier II male users, 34% found dating comforting after losing or never having a spouse. About 27% of women over 50 sought meaningful companionship — not necessarily romantic — while 12% found lasting friendships through the app.
“We’ve seen seniors seek connections that are genuine — not always romantic or goal-oriented — but deeply meaningful,” says Ravi Mittal, CEO of Quack Quack.
Fighting Stigma and Choosing Joy
Despite the legal safeguards and evolving norms, elderly women in particular face cultural stigmas. “When I told my children I was seeking companionship, they opposed it,” says Sadhana. “But needing support from your children is very different from having a partner to share life with. I was sure about doing this for myself.”
Pune-based Asawari Kulkarni and Anil Yardi met in 2015 through Happy Seniors. They were both 62, and after dating for ten months, decided to live together — without marriage.
A former LIC employee, Asawari had been widowed since 1997. “I didn’t mind being alone while I was working. But after retiring in 2012, even small illnesses would make me feel deeply alone,” she recalls.
The couple’s families were initially opposed to their decision but have since accepted it. “We wanted it to be simple — no legal ties, just companionship,” Asawari says.
But not everyone finds it easy to take that leap. Manimekalai, though open to the idea, hasn’t spoken to her family about it. “In my family, men have remarried. But if a woman does the same, it’s seen as wrong,” she says.
“My husband and I built a life and a family together. I fear it will all fall apart if I express this desire,” she adds.
Psychiatrist Dr Neelanjana Paul from Kolkata says many families are open to connecting elderly parents with prayer groups and hobby clubs — but not with new romantic partners.
“Losing a life partner can rob seniors of a sense of purpose. They miss someone to care for them, share daily routines, and talk to — this is a basic human need,” she says. “Denying them this, especially in their old age, is not just unfair — it’s cruel.”
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